In 1989, the businessman Michael Knighton bid £20mn for Manchester United. On the time it was the best value ever provided for an English soccer membership. United’s proprietor unexpectedly accepted. However the takeover fell via, partly as a result of Knighton raised questions on his personal psychology when he insisted on juggling a ball in entrance of a full stadium whereas wearing membership package.

Now British businessman Jim Ratcliffe and Qatari sheikh Jassim bin Hamad al-Thani are competing to purchase United from the Glazer household. The valuation may exceed $6bn, which might be the best ever for a sports activities membership. Aside from the sums, although, little has modified since Knighton’s day: wealthy males are nonetheless drawn to soccer by motives which are usually misunderstood, typically even by the wealthy males themselves. These individuals are much less rational than they prefer to think about.

The wealthy man usually believes he’ll “run the membership like a enterprise”. He’ll apply his enterprise genius to make income and win trophies. This fantasy is at present serving to to attract many American businesspeople into soccer.

However the “operating it like a enterprise” fantasy infrequently pans out. Virtually the one persistently worthwhile English golf equipment are Manchester United, Arsenal and Tottenham. They have a tendency to make income for 2 causes: first, they’ve large historic fanbases and, second, they often disappoint these fanbases by not pursuing championships.

Soccer’s sorry paradox is that to win titles, you need to break the financial institution by hiring the perfect gamers. A membership that does that, like Roman Abramovich’s Chelsea, will are inclined to lose cash. Most homeowners quickly uncover that that’s the selection they face. They’ll chase both trophies or income, however not each.

They often find yourself with neither. Ratcliffe constructed the Ineos chemical compounds empire, but none of his sports activities groups — Lausanne and Good in soccer, Ineos Britannia in crusing, Ineos Grenadiers in biking — has performed very properly. The American investor Todd Boehly, who purchased Chelsea final yr, has already blown £600mn on new gamers whereas solely making the workforce worse. (Ratcliffe, who payments himself as a United fan, additionally bid for Chelsea, the place he was a longstanding season-ticket holder.)

I as soon as requested Tony Fernandes, who constructed the airline AirAsia, why he did so badly in soccer with Queens Park Rangers. “Two issues are totally different from AirAsia,” he stated. “One is I can management nearly every little thing in AirAsia. You are able to do no matter you need in soccer, but it surely’s as much as 11 guys on the pitch on the finish of the day, proper? The second factor is you may have a really vocal bunch of shareholders — known as followers. Everybody has an opinion. The plans get thrown out of the window if you begin dropping. The joy if you win a soccer sport is unbelievable. The draw back is that if you lose, you need to kill your self.”

Sheikhs who purchase golf equipment usually proclaim a distinct fantasy: they’ll additional their international locations’ nationwide pursuits. Saudi Arabia, for example, purchased Newcastle United supposedly as a part of a technique to construct gentle energy and cut back reliance on oil. EY consultants clarify, with a straight face: “Saudi Arabia is experiencing a singular socio-economic transformation through which sports activities take centre stage within the Kingdom’s huge diversification efforts.”

Even when this actually had been what the Saudis needed, it wouldn’t work. Equally, Qatar’s internet hosting of the World Cup in all probability didn’t assist the nation. Internet hosting principally simply drew consideration to Qatari mistreatment of migrants and LGBT individuals. However actually, hard-headed, self-interested MBA language — which is the high-prestige vocabulary of our time — misunderstands billionaires’ motivations. Most easily aren’t very bothered about both income or the nationwide curiosity.

Some billionaires battle to confess this even to themselves, however what they crave is standing and/or enjoyable. Like medieval kings, billionaires can do no matter they really feel like: ease life’s tedium, meet well-known individuals or be remembered for one thing. Standing and enjoyable are why Elon Musk purchased Twitter, Vladimir Putin invaded Ukraine and why Abu Dhabi’s rulers have chosen to monopolise the Premier League via Manchester Metropolis. The whims of the world’s 2,640 billionaires, as counted by Forbes (12 occasions greater than in Knighton’s day), can change (or finish) our lives.

Weirdly, when billionaires tire of soccer and promote their golf equipment, they usually earn cash anyway. The membership seems to be like a Picasso in your wall. It doesn’t throw off quarterly income, but it surely does usually achieve worth over time. Better of all, if you present it to buddies, they get so jealous that some exit and purchase certainly one of their very own.

Comply with Simon on Twitter @KuperSimon and e-mail him at simon.kuper@ft.com

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